51 Things Lavi is not allowed to do
by nolongeractivesorry
Summary: Lenalee, Allen, and Kanda have had enough of Lavi's insanity. So they've decided to create a list of things Lavi is not allowed to do. But what will happen if Lavi thinks outside the box? One-shot and my first fanfic!


**Author's note: YAY I finally found the time (And fanfiction was finally being nice enough) to submit my first story for this account! XD This was inspired by "51 things Jasdevi is not allowed to do" so this format isn't really mine. =w= I hope you like it anyways! ^^ **

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*Lenalee's POV*

1. Lavi is not allowed to dress up in a black robe, carry a stick around, speak in a British accent, and claim he is "Ron Weasley"

2. Lavi is not allowed to tie Kanda's hair into pigtails when he's not looking

3. Lavi is not allowed to put pink barrettes in Kanda's hair when he's not looking

4. Lavi is not allowed to tie rainbow ribbons in- maybe Lavi should just stay away from Kanda's hair.

5. Lavi is not allowed to draw black crosses on his forehead and run around screaming "NOAH INVASION! I SHALL KILL YOU ALL! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

6. Lavi is not allowed to steal the supply of coffee from the kitchen

7. Therefore making the science team pass out from lack of caffeine.

8. Lavi is not allowed to put on a blond wig and large sunglasses then yell "LADY GAGA HAS ARRIVED TO PERFORM FOR YOU!"

9. Then start singing poker face

10. _Badly…_

11. Lavi is not allowed to randomly jump on a table during lunch

12. Then start singing Barbie girl on the top of his lungs

13. Lavi is not allowed to run around the men's bathroom singing the Constipation song

14. Lavi is not allowed to run around the _women's _bathroom singing the Constipation song.

15. Actually, Lavi isn't allowed to enter the women's bathroom for any reason.

16. Lavi is not allowed to put pale, sparkly makeup all over himself and run around screaming "I'M A BEAUTIFUL SPARKLY VAMPIRE FROM TWILIGHT! WORSHIP ME, FANGIRLS!"

17. Lavi is not allowed to stalk me just to piss Komui off

18. Lavi is not allowed to stalk Kanda to piss Kanda off

19. You know, Lavi shouldn't be allowed to stalk anyone

20. Lavi is not allowed to call Bak on the phone

21. And pretend to be me

22. And say that I love him

23. And make Bak pass out from happiness

24. Therefore confusing me when I receive a bouquet of roses with a card that says "For my dear Lenalee. Love, Bak."

25. Thus putting Bak in a dangerous situation involving my very pissed off brother and his drill.

26. Lavi is not allowed to dress up like a fairy and chuck handfuls of glitter at people's faces, claiming it's his magic pixie dust

27. Lavi is not allowed to buy an electric guitar

28. And an amp

29. And blast rock songs as loud as the amp will go

30. Consequently making people deaf, pass out, suffer nerve damage, or get incredibly pissed at him.

31. Lavi is not allowed to get high on sugar

32. Or caffeine

33. Or alcohol

34. Lavi is not allowed to say "If you don't give me twenty bucks, I will eat your pants."

35. And when you refuse, he is not allowed to actually carry out the threat.

36. Lavi is not allowed to say "ALLEN AND KANDA SITTIN IN A TREE! K-I-S-S-I-N-G" because it's gay.

37. And he is not allowed to get upset when Allen and Kanda try to kill him for singing it

38. Lavi is not allowed to say "ALLEN AND LENALEE SITTIN IN A TREE! K-I-S-S-I-N-G" because my brother will kill Lavi AND Allen.

39. Then start sobbing hysterically and make me promise that I will never ever kiss Allen.

40. Lavi is not allowed to repeat "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes, bum bum bum…" over and over again, because, frankly, it does get on everybody's nerves and he's going to get murdered if he does it again.

41. Lavi is not allowed to steal Kanda's sword.

42. Or paint it girly colors.

43. Or use it as a kitchen knife.

44. Actually, Lavi isn't allowed to touch Kanda's sword any more.

45. Lavi is not allowed to have super glue.

46. Because bad things will happen

47. Lavi is not allowed to tell Komui that Allen and I are dating.

48. Or tell him we are getting married.

49. Or tell him we are having kids.

50. Lavi is not allowed to chuck random objects at people's heads.

"Done," I said proudly and I threw down my pencil. Kanda and Allen whooped and cheered.

"I think that covers everything," Kanda said happily (as happy as he ever is anyways), scanning the list.

"It's perfect," Allen said confidently.

Suddenly, Lavi burst into the room and screamed "CHEESE FIGHT!"

He took out a can of spray cheese, showered us with the orange substance, then ran out of the room, cackling. Kanda's eyes glinted with murderous intent and Allen stared with disbelief at his clothes which were now drenched with cheddar cheese.

I sighed and picked up the pencil again.

51. Lavi is not allowed to have spray cheese.

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**So... what did you think? XD Love it? Hate it? TELL ME IN A REVIEW~ I'd love to get one :3 And definite virtual cookies for the person that gives me my first review EVER~ **

**I hope you liked my attempt at comedy! XD**


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